Am I A Good Person?

I wonder if everyone’s greatest fear is that they might not be a good person? Not good enough, anyway. Underneath anger, hurt, sadness does there simmer a tiny flame of fear that what we have done, what we have said, or thought, or not done, suggests to someone we care about and love that we are basically bad? By bad I think I mean not enough, not the right person, not who it is you really want me to be and who it is you really love. I am bad. It does not necessarily following that you are good. But I am bad because I don’t fully see you and am unable to fully meet your needs and hopes and what you really do deserve from me.

That is what my client feels about her daughter.. Her daughter deserves to be fully seen and embraced by her mother. Her daughter does not feel like my client is doing that. My client feels bad. She feels like a bad mother and a bad person who hasn’t been smart enough and brave enough to do the right thing.
she tortures herself needlessly! NO ONE can do it totally right. We ALWAYS get it only partly right. She is not bad. She is human.

My client’s daughter knows that too. The mother is the one who needs to remember.

Check out your relationship with loved ones. You are not bad. You make mistakes. Some are long-term mistakes and some have long lasting results. And you learn from your mistakes. That is what makes mistakes a good thing. Always they give you to opportunity to learn. Oh, the relief! The joy! The delight: in knowing you have stretched and moved into a greater space. A place where you are more than you were.

You are never bad. You are always learning, growing stretching. Love yourself, don’t torture precious you. You deserve joy.